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Jan 1, 2013
01/13
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WBAL
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joe biden was on. >> joe biden, that's right. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: he was awesome. >> go joe biden! >> jimmy: what's that. don't read my note. okay, you can see it. >> i love joe biden. yes, we were in d.c. shooting and we were so lucky to get the vice president and it was before the election so we were really hoping that they won. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that would have been awkward, yeah. >> it would be a little bit more of a sadder -- sadder scene if that wasn't the case. but he was so great. >> jimmy: here is you and your celebrity crushes. >> look at my face. it's so funny. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: he was great. >> he was so good. he was a natural actor. >> jimmy: is he a good actor? >> oh my god, great improviser, so funny and nice, his like -- i was going to say his cast, but it's the people that work for him, not his cast. [ laughter ] his cast. >> jimmy: his cast is the best. he has the best variety show cast. [ laughter ] a cast of humans -- >> yeah, he was so great. he was like a doll. >> jimmy: yeah, he was good. right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: everyone is going nuts talking about
joe biden was on. >> joe biden, that's right. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: he was awesome. >> go joe biden! >> jimmy: what's that. don't read my note. okay, you can see it. >> i love joe biden. yes, we were in d.c. shooting and we were so lucky to get the vice president and it was before the election so we were really hoping that they won. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that would have been awkward, yeah. >> it would be a little bit more of a sadder -- sadder scene if...
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Jan 19, 2013
01/13
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WBAL
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yesterday joe biden defended the white house's gun control initiative by saying that he actually has two guns himself. and biden was like, and i never leave home without them. [ laughter ] joe, that doesn't make it, why? >> steve: why would he do that? >> jimmy: this week was the season premiere of "american idol." you guys watching "american idol?" [ cheers ] good. and what they are doing this year. they are having people that they are able to nominate their talented friends who don't want to audition, yeah. making someone try out for something they don't really want, or as republicans call that, the romney plan, and it's just -- [ laughter ] hey, listen to this, you guys. the original batmobile from the 1960s "batman" series is expected to sell for $5 million at an auction this weekend. so if you've got $5 million and you want to look like batman, why not just become batman. [ laughter ] make a cave out of papier-mache in your garage. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: like a male escort to come over and dress like -- i don't know how that would work. i've never seen "batman." i don't know
yesterday joe biden defended the white house's gun control initiative by saying that he actually has two guns himself. and biden was like, and i never leave home without them. [ laughter ] joe, that doesn't make it, why? >> steve: why would he do that? >> jimmy: this week was the season premiere of "american idol." you guys watching "american idol?" [ cheers ] good. and what they are doing this year. they are having people that they are able to nominate their...
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Jan 23, 2013
01/13
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KNTV
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biden around in his daily life. [ laughter ] even honey boo boo was like, dude, that would be hilarious. [ laughter ] we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have one of our -- i'm so excited about tonight's show. it's one of the best shows i think we're ever gonna have. >> miles: yeah. it's a big one. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he is one of the greatest comedians of all time. we couldn't be happier to have him back on the show. bill cosby is here! [ cheers and applause ] everything he says is the funniest thing i've ever heard. and it must be tough for him because, you know, when he just has a normal conversation, it sounds like he's doing a bit. like, he could be, like, "i have to go to the bathroom now." and i'd be like, that's hilarious. like, "no, i'm serious. i have to go to --" i mean, just -- gosh, he's so funny, but he's so quick and genius. last time he was here -- i usually say hi to the guests before the show if i can -- and last time i was running late, so i had to just run by his dressi
biden around in his daily life. [ laughter ] even honey boo boo was like, dude, that would be hilarious. [ laughter ] we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have one of our -- i'm so excited about tonight's show. it's one of the best shows i think we're ever gonna have. >> miles: yeah. it's a big one. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he is one of the greatest comedians of all time. we couldn't...
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Jan 8, 2013
01/13
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KNTV
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i hear joe biden and his wife left d.c. this weekend for a five-day vacation in the caribbean. yeah. of course, most of that time will be spent telling him that margaritaville isn't a real place. [ laughter ] "it's not? all right, well, let's go to funky town then. [ laughter ] we'll take electric avenue." [ laughter ] get this. a democratic congressman just introduced a new bill that would let president obama run for a third term. [ cheers and applause ] even president obama was like, "hey, buddy." [ laughter ] anyway. speaking of obama, the white house announced that at&t will sponsor president obama's second inauguration. it's gonna be great. it's like -- [ as obama ] "my fellow americans. you're breaking up. are you in a tunnel? [ laughter ] are you in a tunnel?" this is a big story, here. tmz has posted pictures of justin bieber smoking weed at a party last week. [ audience ohs ] [ cheers and applause ] it is pretty embarrassing. it's pretty embarrassing. weed was like, "yeah, i don't normally do this. [ laughter ] i won't do this again. i won't do this again." >> steve: c
i hear joe biden and his wife left d.c. this weekend for a five-day vacation in the caribbean. yeah. of course, most of that time will be spent telling him that margaritaville isn't a real place. [ laughter ] "it's not? all right, well, let's go to funky town then. [ laughter ] we'll take electric avenue." [ laughter ] get this. a democratic congressman just introduced a new bill that would let president obama run for a third term. [ cheers and applause ] even president obama was...
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Jan 12, 2013
01/13
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KNTV
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or as joe biden called them, not the wiggles. [ laughter ] major tv news yesterday, meredith vieira announced that she is leaving "who wants to be a millionaire" so that she can work for nbc news. it will be weird when vieira says, "breaking news, there's been a major earthquake in, a, canada, b, france, c, america or, d, brazil." [ laughter ] some more political news. a new survey found that 77% of americans think politicians do serious harm to the country. politicians are like, cool, at least they think we do something. [ laughter ] it's a win, right? let's go out for a beer. [ cheers and applause ] big news here. beyonce will reunite with her destiny's child bandmates on stage at the super bowl halftime show. [ cheers and applause ] big news. yeah, and rumor has it they finally think we're ready for that jelly. [ laughter ] i heard that major league baseball will implement tougher drug testing this year to screen for human growth hormone. meanwhile, baseball players are like, what are you talking about? [ laughter ] this isn't good. yesterday american express announced that it had to cut m
or as joe biden called them, not the wiggles. [ laughter ] major tv news yesterday, meredith vieira announced that she is leaving "who wants to be a millionaire" so that she can work for nbc news. it will be weird when vieira says, "breaking news, there's been a major earthquake in, a, canada, b, france, c, america or, d, brazil." [ laughter ] some more political news. a new survey found that 77% of americans think politicians do serious harm to the country. politicians are...
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Jan 29, 2013
01/13
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KNTV
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joe biden's been rumored. there's a long -- i was just about to say there's a long way between now and election day. really, there's two years. because two years from now, you got to start going to iowa, new hampshire, south carolina. dinner, dinner, dinner, breakfast, lunch. the iowa caucuses are a year before the election. we'll already be out in the cold. it really will be underway in just two years. i know it's depressing. i'm sorry. it's just the way our system works. >> jimmy: that's the way it works. isn't that unbelievable? i wish it would change. because i just think it's a little too crazy. >> at least we have a lot to show for the $3 billion we spent on the campaign. >> jimmy: i know, exactly. it's kind of silly. you said on "rock center" -- you did a thing. you said this is the inauguration of the gif. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: the animated gif. >> gifs really loomed large. came to play this year. poor sasha obama. you put any kid at a boring event. what's going to happen to the human? you're gonna
joe biden's been rumored. there's a long -- i was just about to say there's a long way between now and election day. really, there's two years. because two years from now, you got to start going to iowa, new hampshire, south carolina. dinner, dinner, dinner, breakfast, lunch. the iowa caucuses are a year before the election. we'll already be out in the cold. it really will be underway in just two years. i know it's depressing. i'm sorry. it's just the way our system works. >> jimmy:...
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. [ laughter ] [ as joe biden ] a lot shorter than i thought he was. [ laughter ] [ normal voice ] listen to this. a report just found that some new tvs can actually spy on their owners because they come in with built-in cameras and microphones. yeah. [ audience oohs ] i got kind of nervous when i heard that, but then my tv was like, "chill out, man." [ laughter ] "go fix your hair." you guys see this? earlier this week, taylor swift took her new boyfriend, harry styles, to a tattoo parlor in l.a. and he got this giant ship on his arm. it's pretty ugly. look, here. look, there's his tattoo there. [ audience oohs ] yeah. got some guns, too. >> steve: gun show. >> jimmy: but, actually, she got a tattoo as well. we have a close-up of the one she got. look at that. isn't that nice? [ cheers and applause ] very nice tattoo. everyone getting -- everyone gets a tattoo. [ applause ] everyone gets a tattoo. look under your seats. guys, i read that next year the former head of microsoft windows will teach a class at harvard business school. it's a little annoying, though. whenever a student asks a
. [ laughter ] [ as joe biden ] a lot shorter than i thought he was. [ laughter ] [ normal voice ] listen to this. a report just found that some new tvs can actually spy on their owners because they come in with built-in cameras and microphones. yeah. [ audience oohs ] i got kind of nervous when i heard that, but then my tv was like, "chill out, man." [ laughter ] "go fix your hair." you guys see this? earlier this week, taylor swift took her new boyfriend, harry styles, to...
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Jan 10, 2013
01/13
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WBAL
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or as joe biden put it, "why's everyone looking at me?" [ laughter ] here's a big story. lance armstrong will sit down for a 90-minute interview with oprah that will air next week. [ audience oohs ] 90 minutes -- so, it'll be a little suspicious when he finishes in just 60 minutes. [ laughter ] what happened? i don't believe it. >> steve: that's nuts. >> jimmy: what did you say? >> steve: what's that? >> jimmy: what did you say? >> steve: i said it's nuts. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] sorry. i'm sorry. >> jimmy: it actually isn't -- >> steve: it's nuts. >> jimmy: -- it actually isn't nuts. >> steve: it's nuts. >> jimmy: it is, yeah. [ laughter ] >> steve: nuts. >> jimmy: this isn't good, you guys. [ laughter ] you guys, i read that iran is behind some recent cyber attacks against american banks. yeah. people could tell something was going on when they started seeing a convenience of three goats. [ laughter ] i gotta do it. [ in foreign accent ] "i have got three goats, my friend. my friend." [ laughter ] "three goats, my friend. i'll give you three goats, my frien
or as joe biden put it, "why's everyone looking at me?" [ laughter ] here's a big story. lance armstrong will sit down for a 90-minute interview with oprah that will air next week. [ audience oohs ] 90 minutes -- so, it'll be a little suspicious when he finishes in just 60 minutes. [ laughter ] what happened? i don't believe it. >> steve: that's nuts. >> jimmy: what did you say? >> steve: what's that? >> jimmy: what did you say? >> steve: i said it's...